(no subject)

[cephalopod]

These motherfucking kink_bingo people and their motherfucking blackouts! That said, so far as  I have seen there is no actual fucking of mothers. And I certainly don't dislike the blackouts or the people making them. They are awesome and exciting, but also really goddamn intimidating. I gotta stop watching the comm until I've got at least a bingo.

They're all so damned prolific...Christ I'm rusty.

Comments

[cypher]

I am sort of having that problem, too. I have been alternately (a) telling myself most of them probably aren't good (though I follow one of them, and she *is*); (b) consoling myself with the fact that I knew I wasn't going to win anyway; and (c) being fussy despite (a) and (b).

...none of these things are as conducive to porn as I'd like them to be.

[cephalopod]

Insecurity is death to porn. Really unpleasant, lingering death, with brief bouts of guilt-ridden productivity that make you wince in the morning.

(well, for me.)

Phlegh, there is clearly a dire loss of momentum and a plague of self-doubt going around like a cold. I saw your second-guessing post re: publishability and couldn't think of anything helpful to say, but I absolutely know where you're coming from there. Maybe a good option to igloo away from other fanworks, poke the source material again?

[subtext]

Heh, I hear you. I'm just not going to worry about getting a blackout myself unless I genuinely want to do all the prompts that much, y'know? Since we can ask for a new card after a bingo, I'm aiming relatively low-- although a line bingo would still be something to be perfectly proud of, since it means a certain amount of dedication! After all, one story is the first milestone. The game aspect and the competition aspect are energizing to some people, but while the game incentive works for me, if I treat it as a competition I'm much more inclined to freeze up and feel inadequate. I decided to think of it instead as a bunch of really clear prompts with an interesting, Solitaire-like reason to try to do them in a pattern that's not completely dictated by my personal taste. (Also, we can expect little Internet reward cookies for doing each one.)

Remember you're awesomeface. It's okay to be rusty, and it's okay to feel insecure and make anguished noises when someone else seems to be Doing It Better and your hindbrain is trying to claim that as evidence that you're somehow inadequate. These feelings are normal. Everybody does it, including the authors who are making a (small, careful) living from selling their published work. I find this reassuring.

Since the required story length isn't that much and we work (play) well together, would you be interested in trying for a bingo of some kind as a writing team on a new card (or either of ours, since they can be reused)? You know I'm not free to do anything creative before I arrive in town at this point, and then I'll have Mom around for awhile afterward, which is also probably not conducive to writing kinky smut with you-- but it's not as though these cards expire like eggs, either. :D